Idiosyncracies of Book-collecting

Funny enough, I don't suffer the completist syndrome with my bibliophilia unlike some other forms of collecting.*

What I do suffer from is complementary to my almost addictive need to go through second-hand bookshops. Usually if I find something I like, I would immediately buy it given the cheap cost. But there are days when I even lack the money to buy cigarettes (which is around 2 bucks a stick) so finding a good book during those times can be sheer torture of self-denial. And when I do finally have the money, usually the book is gone by then.

That's when I suffer from what I call a 'Holy Grail' fixation, in which I try to find another copy of the missing book. Sometimes I get lucky, like when I found a hardbound copy of Michael Swanwick's Jack Faust. But most of the time, when it's gone, it's gone.

So it was with some determination that I recently emailed a friend of my mother in the US if I could order some literally hard-to-find books in different online venues like abebooks, Barnes and Noble and even eBay. And after a solid two months of waiting, the shipment finally came in today. The books that came in were:

1. Waking Beauty, Paul Witcover
2. Fitzpatrick's War, Theodore Judson
3. Point of Hopes, Melissa Scott and Lisa Barnett
4. Thirteen Phantasms and Other Stories, James Blaylock

I know I've mentioned this before but my first thought when I think of that Holy Grail of a book is Waking Beauty by Paul Witcover, which I once mentioned here. On the other hand, I once saw this hardbound of Judson's alternative SF book, Fitzpatrick's War, at Booksale but wasn't able to buy it because it was slightly pricier at HB prices. Scott and Barnett's fantastical Renaissance mystery Point of Hopes is a weird duck in that I managed to get its sequel, Point of Dreams, first (a long, long time ago, actually). Now I have this bad habit of reading book 2 of a series and then buying book 1 after because I liked what I read. However, time and other books have overtaken me such that I never had a chance to read the sequel yet despite its lovely cover. I guess this time I'll be reading it in sequence then. And then there's Blaylock's short story-collection** I found in the mega-branch of National Bookstore in Cubao but didn't pick up. What was I thinking?!?

Unfortunately-- and here's the funny part-- what do I do now that I've managed to gain the Holy Grail? I admit to some feelings of dissatisfaction and disgruntlement especially now that I've scored a copy of the Witcover. To paraphrase that famous saying, What now, brown cow? Look for another Grail, I guess. A look in my booklist reveals other missing books in my collection. But it's a saddening realization: that as a book-collector, it's more of the search rather than the finding of the book that's important for me.

*Of course I admit that I do suffer from a rather different version of completist suffering. It usually involves lack of time, i.e. I don't have time to read continually a series of books. So rather than skip a particular book when I do find it, I usually snap it up as soon as I can-- which is why I end up with a particular large store of unread books. Unfortunately, sometimes I end up liking the series of books but most of the time, age has turned me unappreciative of that very first book I read when I was younger and thus, rendering that series I managed to complete in vain. Ah well...

**Aha! It seems that a book slipped through my cursory inspection of the balikbayan box it came in: a mmpb copy of James Blaylock's Thirteen Phantasms and Other Stories. Now I'm slightly more happy to forego the next search of the Holy Grail.***

***Hmmm...Obviously, when the next Holy Grail does come up, I'll probably rant and rail against the injustices of the world about how I can't afford it and waiting impatiently for the next pay check to come in. But in the meantime, I'll try to be satisfied with what I have...

... right, can't believe it either, eh?